Amanda (jing-wen.com)

These interviews started with the intention of getting to know my online friends better, and exposing a side of them that might not necessarily be apparent online. Each interviewee was asked ten questions, five of which were generic, and five of which directly applied to the specific individual. If you are interested in being interviewed, please leave a comment on this post.

Interview with Amanda of jing-wen.com:

• Do your friends and family know you have a blog? If so, do they read it?
  Off the top of my head, I’d say that about a dozen RL friends know about my blog – about five read regularly, but only one ever comments (any time you see a comment from a Rebekah, that’s her!). None of them would ever speak to me in person about my blog though. Surprisingly few friends know about it – I don’t try to hide the fact that I have a blog, but then again, I’m not the type of person who will come out and randomly talk about it unless a RL conversation is about new media technologies and digital communication…which it rarely is! Basically, unless it’s relevant to the discussion at hand, I don’t talk about my blog, and thus there’s no reason for my friends to know about it!

  As for my family, I know my brother knows about my blog, though I also know that he doesn’t care enough to read it. My parents I think have a vague idea – I told them roughly two years ago and their only response was “You don’t have anything interesting enough to write about, would anyone even read it?”. Little do they know! I never worry about them reading the blog however as: 1) my dad uses the internet regularly, but only to browse Chinese websites. He can’t read English, so he’d never read my blog; 2) my mum is technologically spastic and doesn’t know how to use the Internet, though she can read English. I only have to worry when they join forces and work together to get to my blog!

• When did you first start becoming involved in the “internet world”?
  Our family was first connected to the Internet when I was thirteen – so nearly a decade ago. For four years however, the Internet was a sporadic tool for my studies. I never got into the Neopets or dolling craze as so many people did at that age. It wasn’t until January 2004 at the age of seventeen, when I went to the Australian Open for a few days, that I decided to search online for some tennis-related sites. I ended up at a Juan Carlos Ferrero fansite (he’s a Spanish tennis player who I had a HUMONGOUS crush on), and from there, joined the JCF fan forum. It’s really inactive now and filled with spam, but for the next two or so years, that was my Internet hangout. I made some friends on that forum that have now become RL friends (Tracey for instance), and in the time I was there, I got into: design, blogging, fanlistings, etc., as that was what all the senior members on the forum did.

  In 2006 when the sheen went off the JCF fan forum, I’d started becoming more involved in the TFL board, though I don’t think I was ever really accepted as an important member. 2006 was also when I started making a name for myself in the blogging world – I started getting more regular comments, more random visitors, and people started reading for what I had to write, rather than simply visiting because we were forum buddies. That was a real turning point for me, and from 2007 onwards, blogging (and involving myself in the blogging community) became the primary thing I did online, rather than forums. It’s been that way ever since – forums take a distinctive back seat to the blog community (though of course there’s some overlap).

  I guess if I was to sum it up, it’ll be something like:

  • 2000-2003: Internet for academic purposes only!
  • 2004: Juan Carlos Ferrero fan forum, getting into design and fanlistings
  • 2005: Got into blogging, started a WPR, became active on TFL
  • 2006: Blogging became my primary online activity
  • 2007-2009: Joined Snark forums, continued to refine blogging approach
• What are your favorite places to visit online?
  Off the top of my head, the sites that I always have open in a tab are:
  • http://jing-wen.com/ (my own blog, I like to check for comments!)
  • http://eclectic62442.livejournal.com/friends (my LJ friends page, I comment on LJ entries more than I do actual blog entries)
  • http://gmail.com
  • http://google.com/reader (I’m subscribed to about 300+ feeds, someone always posts!)
  • http://ebay.com.au

  I also visit Snark forums, check my uni email, and lately, lots of jobsearch websites for…obvious reasons, needing an income being the main one.

• Do you ever feel like it’s hard to maintain a balance between online and offline life?
  It’s funny that you ask this, because one of my recent LJ entries said:

  To this day, I don’t quite understand how blogging could have become so instinctive. When something interesting happens to me, instead of fully living in the moment, there’s a little voice in the back of my head that says “Hey, how could you write this up as a blog entry?”. I’m trying to correct this, and to allow myself to live fully in the moment – and to only think about potential blog material when the event itself is actually over.

  But otherwise, I think I have a healthy balance between the two. I see my friends often, I study (sporadically), I work (when I have a job), and the only void in my life that the Internet fills is for creative expression – e.g. blogging, which I supposed I could fill in RL if I started a journal or something, but I prefer the feedback that I do get.

  Otherwise, I don’t think about online matters when I’m offline, I don’t talk about online life with RL people, and I’m quite happy to be apart from the Internet for long stretches of time – e.g. I’ve spent a month without internet in 2007 when I moved house, and have gone for two months at a time without internet when I’ve been on holiday. It’s really not as hard as it seems!

• Does your online personality differ from your offline personality? Do you find yourself acting differently in situations online than you would offline?
  I think anyone who’s met me in real life after having known me first online (and off the top of my head, there’s been at least a dozen people!) would say that I’m pretty much exactly the same person offline as online. I’m as random, exuberant, lascivious, and laissez-faire in real life as I am online – I’m happy to converse on any topic (taboo or not), I’m fond of knocking people over with bear hugs (RL version of a glomp imho), gawk at hot men, etc.

  I can however, perhaps be more serious online than off because I’ve had more time to think things over rather than spouting off the first thing that comes to mind (which considering my temperament is inevitably something immature like: “YEAH WELL, YOUR MUM!”). On the other hand, I’m probably a lot friendlier offline than on – I will make conversation with the wallflower in the corner so that they don’t feel left out, whereas online, I’m more likely to ignore uninteresting people who have nothing to say.

• You often have blog entries related to frugality and money-saving tips. What is some general advice you would give to someone if they wanted to know successful ways to save money?
  It’s always hard to give advice without knowing the circumstances that the individual is in. For the most part however, the most basic advice is: Don’t spend money you don’t have in the pursuit of instant gratification. I’m not a fan of credit cards at all, and I see too many people seeking to alleviate a temporary desire by putting unnecessary items on their credit card. No, you really don’t need that new PS3 game right now. You don’t need those new black boots. You don’t need that $200 collector’s edition of XYZ. You don’t really need anything other than food, shelter, education, healthcare, clothing, and the love of those around you. Discretionary spending is nice in small doses, but when it becomes the only way you can deal with issues in your life, there’s a clear problem. You need to find another coping mechanism.

  I think it’s terrifying that people can lead such unfulfilled lives that only the pursuit of buying more stuff can make them happy. Why are our houses jampacked with useless items that are bought, used once, then discarded when you still have hundreds of thousands left on the mortgage? The blatant consumerism and disregard for any semblance of fiscal responsibility, and the environmentally unfriendly practices that go hand in hand with it are going to destroy the world for future generations. The recent Wall St crash will hopefully be the catalyst for a new era of frugality, a retreat to the things that really matter in life, and a collective conscience for not spending beyond one’s means.

  More general advice I guess, is to budget. Take your annual pay, subtract rent and housing expenses (as a general rule, rent shouldn’t be any more than 35%-40% of your annual income – if it’s any more you need to earn more money or find somewhere else to live!), basic food expenses, any regular bills (insurance, car repair, etc.), put at least 20% aside as savings for the future (you need to plan for when you don’t have an income!), and whatever you have left after that is your discretionary spending for technically “unnecessary” things like shopping, dining out, entertainment expenses, etc. It could only be 5% of your income or it could be as much as 40% of your income – it doesn’t matter. You stick to that amount, and never go over it – if you go under, think about increasing the amount you save!

• You are fairly open about your sexual adventures/activities. Do you ever feel people use that to make a wrong and/or unfair judgment against you, whether it be online or offline?
  Yes, yes, and yes. I’ve received anonymous comments on my sex-related entries before along the lines of “you’re a whore”. Mmm, don’t you just love those anonymous comments?

  My RL friends love me for who I am, sexual innuendoes, flirty behaviour, sexy bed tales, and all. Strangers (or, not strangers per se, but people who aren’t close friends) find it intimidating at first, but soon grow to accept it as part of my quirky charm. After all, it’s not all I talk about – it’s just one topic amongst a million, much like how another person might reference something from their favourite TV show in conversation, the non-TV-watching me will reference something about sex.

  As for online, my regular commenters love hearing about my sexcapades – largely because I think I’m discreet in the way I write about it and I won’t be graphic and say “OMG his penis was so girthy, it was almost like having a beer can in my pussy”, which I’ve actually seen on a blog before. I think it also helps that I have a tendency of using textbook English when talking about sex, so that it becomes somewhat clinical rather than personal – it’s easy for my readers to detach themselves and view it critically rather than becoming involved in it.

  Basically, among the people who matter however, I’ve never been judged. And among those who don’t matter – who really cares what they think? :)

• It seems as though you have the perfect wardrobe everyone desires – it’s versatile, yet stylish. What is some advice you’d give to someone looking to expand their wardrobe, but didn’t know where to start?
  The most important thing is to know what you already have, and to assess what’s currently in your wardrobe (I personally recently made a spreadsheet to help me decide where to cut down for a planned move overseas)! I’m a firm believer in the philosophy that every piece you own in your wardrobe should go in at least two different outfits, and that all of them should be equally as wearable. If you don’t wear it or fit it (trust me, you’ll never be able to lose enough weight to get back into those jeans you wore when you were fifteen) – get rid of it! Sell it on eBay if it’s in good condition, give it to charity if it’s in average condition, and turn it into a dishrag if it’s in terrible condition!

  After you’ve purged your current wardrobe of things you won’t use, the most important thing is not to succumb to the urge to rebuy items just to fill it up. With each new purchase you make, ask yourself a number of questions:

  • Do I already have anything that’s similar to this item?
  • Can I incorporate this item into at least two different outfits that I already own?
  • How versatile is this item? Can I wear it to different types of events, or is it a single-obscure-event-only type of occasion?
  • What’s the quality of the item? Is it simple wash and wear? Can I just throw it into the washing machine without a care?
  • Does the item actually suit my body shape?
  • Is the colour of the item flattering for my skin tone?

  And a whole heap of other questions along the same lines – especially if you’re a frugal fashion lover who hates spending large sums on clothing. Some questions you’ll find hard to answer, and it’s really only through trial and error that you can learn about things like how to tell the wash-and-wear quality of an item, how to figure out suitable colours, how to stop deluding yourself that you can suit skinny jeans, etc.

  To sum the whole “versatility and style” philosophy though: “know your own body, and shop according to your lifestyle and what you already own”.

• You have a passion for traveling. What is your favorite place to visit out of all the places you have seen? What place do you want to visit the most that you have not visited yet?
  Surprisingly (especially considering my plans to move there after a recent holiday), the UK doesn’t figure amongst my top ten of places I enjoy visiting. Largely because I view it more as a home, rather than a holiday destination. Rather, my favourite holiday destination would probably be Shanghai – I’ve spent about three months there in the past as an exchange student in the holidays, and every time I return, I feel a frisson of excitement that lasts for the entire time I’m there. It’s the sheer activity of the city – it never sleeps, and it’s constantly changing and modernising while still managing to hold onto some important traditions. I also love returning to Hong Kong, as most of my extended family live there, and deep deep down, I’m really nothing but a girl who loves to be spoiled by her extended family.

  As for places I want to visit, it’s really hard for me to narrow down the huge mental list I’ve got! Aside from my immediate plans to move to the UK, my next major planned trip is in 2014, to Brazil for the World Cup. I’d also take the chance in that trip to explore a bit more of South America – I’ve researched a youth camping tour that takes you trekking through the jungles through most of the continent, so that would be amazing!

• You are willing to take risks if the benefits outweigh the negatives, such as your upcoming move from Australia to England. Is there something you regret not doing, or know that you could never do no matter what happens?
  I regret the fact that I have regrets – if I’d lived life the way I should have, I wouldn’t have them at all. The one regret I have that’s most linked to not taking risks however, is the way I lived the last couple of years of high school. The stereotype of the geeky kid who worked from the moment they got home from school until bedtime? Who studied religiously, who wrote five, six, seven drafts of the one essay? Who took extra lessons and tutoring outside of school hours to maximise their final exam scores? Yeah, that was me. I got the marks in the end, but at what cost? I should have said yes more often to going out with friends, yes more often to parties, shouldn’t have tied up phone conversations as quickly as I did, etc. I was 16/17/18, I should have enjoyed my youth a lot more than I did.

  As for what I could never do…well, I’m a bit of an adrenaline junkie – give me something tall to jump off or out of, and I’ll do it (preferably with a parachute or bungee cord attached…). It’s been a constant source of disappointment for me to know that as much as I’d love to, I could never ever train for my pilot’s license. My bad eyesight simply makes it an impossibility (actually, illegal) for me to do so. There’s some consolation in the other licenses that I can train for (I’m contemplating a scuba-diving license…), but it’s irritating to know that because of some crap inherited genes, I’m excluded from something as exciting as piloting a plane.

Tags: interviews