Comments on: Getting Back Together With Someone

By: The Wise Words of My Mother | breakthesky.net

The Wise Words of My Mother | breakthesky.net — Sat, 27 Mar 2010 22:31:03 +0000

[...] my most recent ex briefly floated the idea of getting back together, I had no idea what to do. Part of me was willing to consider it as it seemed too rash to rule anything out immediately. But [...]

By: Detoxify | breakthesky.net

Detoxify | breakthesky.net — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 05:27:27 +0000

[...] ex-boyfriends that waffle between wanting to transition into becoming friends after the breakup and getting back together. Gone are all the relationships in my life that I have been hanging onto for far too long without [...]

By: Alice

Alice — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 21:08:32 +0000

I don’t really have any significant relationship experience, well not for a while now anyway lol but I think my concern would be as you’ve pointed out, the issues that were the reason for breaking up are still there. I think you can miss someone and still be in love with them but without fixing the problem it will just never work out.

Also either party needs to work out what they want from getting back together, I don’t there is room to be flaky about it.

Of my friends who have got back together with their ex’s it has never worked out, and in one specific case it went very badly the second time round.

But until I am faced with the situation, I’ve no idea what I would do.

By: Dayna

Dayna — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 08:01:03 +0000

Whether or not I will choose to get back together with the guy will depend on what caused our breakup in the first place. I’m not someone who will tolerate my guy not being faithful to me. I trust him and if he chooses to abuse the trust, I will leave him, no questions asked. I wouldn’t turn back either. I wouldn’t want to give him a second chance to hurt me again.

By: Manda

Manda — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 02:02:17 +0000

In my experience, when I had an ex that wanted to get back together with me, it just felt like he wasn’t sure of what he was doing. It was like the ex was second guessing our breakup, but when we broke up he was second guessing the reasons why we got together in the first place. I’m not comfortable with the idea of being dropped and picked up on a whim, or with me following a boy’s decisions about “us” without any say in the matter. When it’s a case like that, the person who is doing the waffling about definitely needs to get their act together before involving other people in their life.

By: Cecilie

Cecilie — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 01:56:49 +0000

I don’t really believe that getting back together with your ex is a smart thing to do. In most cases it doesn’t work out, and ends worse than the first time. But of course, it can work out.

By: Manda

Manda — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 01:35:26 +0000

I think one of my personal concerns about taking back an ex is the matter of settling vs reaching. I don’t want to settle on a man/have a man settle on me; no one is comfortable with the idea of being a consolation prize. I want to be a priority, not an option :P

By: Vanesa

Vanesa — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 23:38:17 +0000

What a coincidence! I was just think about this when I stumbled upon this blog from the Weblog Awards.

I think getting back together with someone is not a very good idea if you don’t want to feel like an idiot or get hurt again. If the person truly valued you, they wouldn’t have hurt you in that way unless it was a misunderstanding. You just can’t take them back – there are plenty of people out there to be happy with, and they’ll have learned their lesson and have come out stronger and better.

By: Jenni

Jenni — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 12:49:38 +0000

I read ‘He’s Just Not That Into You’ and thought most of it was really good, but there were some weird points!

Every boyfriend I’ve ever had wanted to get back with me after he dumped me, but I found from experience that it just doesn’t work!

By: Amanda

Amanda — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 06:28:44 +0000

The only time the whole “getting back together thing” is even semi-relevant to me was with a boy who i was ultimately being emotionally abused by (a reaaally long story, but it was SO unhealthy, and a ridiculously crazy downward spiral) – it got really on and off towards the end it was crazy.

But, i agree with you in terms of the fact that, if someone ever wanted to get back together with me, it would only be considered IF we worked through the reasons why we’d broken up in the first place. Eg, there’s an ex with whom i am still very close friends with, and we still have very good chemistry, etc… but once, after many friends harassing us about getting back together, we had a long talk and both agreed that, at the core of it, we are just too different and if we dated we would still fight for the same reasons and that would just be stupid.