Comments on: Apparently, I’m Fat and Ugly

By: The Underachievers | breakthesky.net

The Underachievers | breakthesky.net — Tue, 14 Jun 2011 14:03:56 +0000

[...] it is too easy to compare our accomplishments (as we are in such similar places in our lives. Comparisons are inevitable when part of an Asian family, but it’s kind of pathetic when you come off as the underachiever because you actually are [...]

By: I Am Me | breakthesky.net

I Am Me | breakthesky.net — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 16:29:10 +0000

[...] school and college. I know the ins and outs of both Asian culture and Western culture, from the importance of displaying modesty to bragging about one’s achievements. I go out and have fun with the best of them, yet study [...]

By: Charlie

Charlie — Sun, 25 Jul 2010 11:33:54 +0000

That sounds irritating. But then I’m looking at it from a different perspective.

By: Manda

Manda — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 18:45:18 +0000

I’m lucky in the sense that I know my mother doesn’t really mean that I’m fat or ugly. Like Melody said in her comment, my mom has no trouble praising me in the privacy of our own home. Whether or not this is because I’m half Asian and thus, the rules are a little different for me, or because this is just how my mom is, I don’t know. Not all kids have the luxury of knowing their parents really don’t mean the insults.

By: Meg

Meg — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 17:35:34 +0000

Ugh. I understand that this happens in Asian culture, having been subjected to it my entire life, and I know our culture emphasizes modesty, but I’ll never understand why or how or what the point is of putting down your own child. It hurts even more when parents mean the insults and say the same things behind closed doors, too.

By: SassyGirl

SassyGirl — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 15:09:12 +0000

Ah, it seems like this is the fate of all Chinese children. Our culture is built on modesty. In the past, we used to introduce ourselves with, “I am so-and-so, I put my ignorant self in your hands.” Confidence is definitely not something that we encourage, apparently.

By: Manda

Manda — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 14:50:40 +0000

Honestly, it’s not as bad as it sounds. Like I said, it’s routine stuff and the kids and parents both expect it to happen. Personally, I’d rather have it all said to my face than behind my back anyway, even if the criticisms aren’t always genuine.

By: Jem

Jem — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 09:02:11 +0000

Everything I want to say will come across as either racist or just intolerant and I’m neither so I’ll shut up now… and anyway, I’m pretty sure my family has weirdo habits and rituals that nobody else would understand too.

By: Marie

Marie — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 06:35:42 +0000

Ugh, that sounds awful. I had some rather annoying relatives, but most criticisms are done behind people’s backs. I’ve never had my parents criticize me in front of other people, but I can imagine that it’s not the best feeling int he world. I guess the fact that it’s just the culture lessens the blow, but it would still be offensive for me.

By: Manda

Manda — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 05:55:06 +0000

Well, like I said, this is all routine stuff. The kids know that the parents don’t really mean the put downs, the parents know the kids know that, yet it goes on anyway. When it’s something you grow up with, it’s really not out of the ordinary. It’s all about face; no one truly takes whatever is said to heart but etiquette is etiquette so we all just get it over and done within the first few minutes of meeting.