I have mixed feelings about Valentine’s Day.
I like the idea of appreciating your partner and showing you love him or her and all that. Who wouldn’t? But I don’t really know how I feel about the idea of doing it on a designated day (shouldn’t it be every day, or at least on spontaneous days?) and getting bombarded with marketing ploys by Hallmark and Hershey and 1-800-FLOWERS.
Aside: What I can totally get behind is the fact that Valentine’s Day chocolates go on sale starting on the 15th. Except that I’ve decided to give up chocolate for Lent this year, so this year’s post-Valentine’s Day chocolate sales do me no good. The post-Easter chocolate sales will be better timing for me!
Anyway. That’s not to say I wouldn’t appreciate getting flowers, or chocolate, or going out to dinner, or whatever on Valentine’s Day, because of course I would and I have before. I had a most excellent Valentine’s Day last year, where I received a bouquet of roses from G the first time. I still have one of the flowers from the bouquet saved; I dried it and it’s sitting in a wine bottle vase on my desk at home. But I would appreciate all that stuff on any other day or the year, too.
What I do criticize the holiday for is that it puts a lot of (unnecessary, in some cases) pressure on guys and inevitably provides a platform for couples to draw comparisons about their relationship to that of others – as if the fact that Girl A’s boyfriend took her out to a fancy dinner complete with a reservation at a luxurious hotel for the evening obviously means that their relationship is a happier one that that of Girl B’s, whose boyfriend “only” took her out to dinner and gave her conversation hearts, not nice chocolates, and regular ol’ flowers, not roses. Like spending more money automatically equates more happiness!
For a holiday that is meant to be all about love and appreciation, there sure is a lot of pressure involved. Not to mention the expectation of spending lots of money, which is ironic because money can’t buy love.
There is a lot of pressure on the day if you let it get to you and actually think about it. Otherwise, it’s just another day.
I don’t even think about it, and I forgot it was coming at all. Good thing BF baked me a cake
I like Valentine’s Day. It’s fun and people should only do as much or as little as they want. With pressure on guys, though, I don’t think Valentine Day’s is the real problem. Even without it, there will be pressure. Couples compare engagement rings, spontaneous flower deliveries, birthday presents, dinners out, and so many other things.
I’m actually that Girl A this year because we’ve never really had fancy shmancy celebrations before (very rare). I was Girl B last year minus the flowers/roses, but I still enjoyed every minute with him. The types of Valentine’s day celebrations I prefer are just moments when we can enjoy a nice meal (that we cooked ourselves) rather than going out to eat and a nice movie at home where we could just cuddle on the couch. I’m a simple girl. I was very surprised that Jackson booked a hotel at a beach resort, but I’m pretty sure this will not happen again after another 6 years since we will be grad students.
Valentine’s day gives me so much anxiety, and I’ve never even had a significant other on the day before!! I imagine I’d be such a mess with all of the pressure. haha.
I dislike it because it’s always annoyed me, as I grew up in a house where Valentine’s Day was basically “do or die”, I guess. I don’t know how to explain it.
However, there are some couples who take Valentine’s Day very seriously, because they save up for this day since it’s always on the same day. They can’t afford gifts for each other throughout the year, so the little holidays like Valentine’s Day and such mean a lot to them. :p I understand that part of it.
The money factor, however, is a bit annoying. Thus, I really admire the couples who don’t think that the amount of money they make/spend defines their relationship.
Oh I so agree with you that a major downside of this fake holiday is the pressure to live up to society’s expectations of what you’re supposed to do. Everyone expresses their affection differently and it’s unfair to say that those who don’t give flowers or chocolates or exorbitant gifts are somehow lacking.
But at the end of the day, I’m never going to argue with discount chocolate. So keep on doing your thing, Valentine’s Day.
My husband and I are totally down with the Feb 15 shopping…so we set our “Valentines day” to be the weekend after it actually occurs. That way we have a plethora of discounted but still awesome stuff to get each other and if we decide to have a romantic weekend not every place is booked up. Every year is different so some sometimes we just get each other nice chocolates and sometimes we take a romantic trip, but no matter what we’ve never been dissapointed. If I can’t afford a gift I just look at it as a way to exercise my creativity (one time I made my husband a little illustrated booklet about how we met) I think if people concentrated on the “celebrating love” part more than the “must buy special stuff part” then it would go much better.
And also, it doesn’t just have to be for couples, so single people don’t need to be left out! My mother would always get my brother and I a basket of candy for Valentines
I’m indifferent about V-Day. I don’t love it or hate it. I don’t need special gifts. If I have a significant other, I do wish to simply spend some time with him on this day though. But if I’m single, I’m not going to be mad or upset about it either. I can still appreciate and love the people in my life. The best day is not the 14th but the 15th – when the chocolates go on sale!
Hey Manda!
I hope you had a great valentines day. I get what you’re saying about the holiday but I do think its a good reminder sometimes for people like me who occasionally forget to take my hubby our or say thank you
I try and make sure I do something special for him.
This year we are in the Dominican (I’m totally reading blogs in the lobby taking a break from the crazy vacation vibe) and he was like “great now next year we have to top this”.
But we weren’t even here.for valentines day it just happened because the timing and price was convenient while we were scheduling.it!
So I guess there is a lot of pressure around the holiday.
My inbox was so full of those crazy offers on V-day. It was a bit ridiculous. We do a simple day, usually. Try to spend time together. This year we’re celebrating a few days late, so maybe we can enjoy our day a bit cheaper! I’m such a shallow b, though….I love getting flowers delivered to me in public places like work or whatever. Unfortunately it’s probably because it inspires that jealousy and comparison that you’re talking about. I’ve been on the other side of that equation, too, though. And it sucks. I need to work on being a better human being.
I sure do agree with you! I wish Valentine’s Day didn’t put so much pressure on guys, especially. & I wish a lot of girls would stop expecting their boyfriends or guys that are interested in them to spend so much $$$ on a single day – it’s ridiculous.
Although, it does make it easier for guys
I’m just guessing they’d rather buy expensive jewelry and flowers one day a year than everyday! haha. It’s funny that they’re technically saving money while spending a whole lot of it.